December and January’s Horoscopes

Aries - You will feel an air of boldness take over you this month

Taurus - Your energy is screaming of the need for a new potted plant

Gemini - You will make a new friend this week

Cancer - You will master the art of a jam tart

Leo - You will finally be turned off of sprite

Virgo - Your sourdough starter will live another week

Libra - Your favourite sports team will horribly lose this week

Scorpio - Your energy says that you will ace your next test

Sagittarius - You will discover something new and sparkly in 4 days

Capricorn - You will soon feel the intense urge to play the harmonica

Aquarius - You will finally decide, gold or silver

Pisces - You will solve the NYT crossword in an hour next week